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ALABAMA COALITION AGAINST DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

NATIONAL CENTER ON DOMESTIC AND SEXUAL VIOLENCE

ALABAMA CRIME VICTIMS COMP. COMMISSION

TUSCUMBIA HOUSING AUTHORITY

FLORENCE HOUSING AUTHORITY

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Am I in an Abusive Relationship?

You may be abused if you:

  • are frightened of your partner's temper, often agree because you are afraid to hurt your partner's feelings or are afraid of your partner's anger.

  • have the urge to ``rescue'' your partner when your partner is troubled.

  • Find yourself apologizing to yourself or to others for your partner's behavior.

  • have been hit, kicked, shoved, or had things thrown at you by your partner when he or she was jealous or angry.

  • make plans and decisions about activities and friends according to what your partner wants or based on how your partner will react.

  • drink heavily or use drugs to escape abuse or painful feelings about your partner.

  • are treated badly or embarrassed by your partner in front of others.

  • agree to have sex even if you are uncomfortable about it.

Am I an Abuser?

You may be an abuser if you:

  • are very jealous.

  • sulk silently when upset.

  • have an explosive temper.

  • criticize your partner a lot.

  • have difficulty expressing feelings.

  • drink heavily or use drugs.

  • are protective of your partner to the point of controlling.

  • control your partner's behavior, friends, and decisions.

  • have broken things, thrown things at your partner, hit, shoved, or kicked your partner when angry.

Warning signs of an abusive personality

  • Jealousy.
  • Controlling Behavior - Constantly questions who you spend your time with, what you did/said and where you went.
  • Isolation - Puts down everyone you know. Doesn't allow you to talk or visit with family or friends.
  • Blames Others for Problems/Feelings - It's always someone else's fault.
  • Hypersensitivity - Sees everything as personal attacks.
  • Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde Personality - Sudden mood changes, One minute nice/next minute exploding.
  • Past Battering - You may hear the person was abusive to someone else, they may say it's a lie, their ex was crazy or it wasn't that bad.
  • Any show of force or threat during an argument.
  • Doesn't respect your property or privacy.

 
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