CHRISTMAS AT LIBBY'S 

Twas the night before Christmas when all thru the house

The Red Hatters were primping, not a pink hatter could be found.

The hats were all propped by the red hat tree with care

In hopes that Queen Wanda would soon be there.

The girls were all donned in their purple and red

While visions of bling danced in their heads.

The Queen in her crown and Prince Consort in his Royal P.J.’s

Had just snuggled in for a short power nap!

When out on the lawn there arose a Red Hatter,

Away to the window I flew in my grape sweater,

Tore open the shutters and hoped it would get better.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave a bling of glitter to objects below,

When what to my wondering eyes came to view

But Queen Wanda and her Red Hat Review!

With a little Red Hatter, so lively & prissy

I knew in a moment it must be Ms. Sissy,

More rapid than policemen in her red van she came

As she whistled and shouted and called them all by name!

Now Don! Now Sam! Now Leroy and Rick,

On Six, On Don, Mike and Leon!

From the seat of her throne to the top of her crown

Now on with you, I’m going to town!

As jewels danced before my eyes like a hurricane flies,

When they met with the feather boas, they collided before my eyes…

What was I to do but make a trip to Malibu!

In a New York minute I knew that Santa Clause had come to say Yahoo!

With the snap of my fingers and clicking of my heels,

I knew that I was dressed fit to kill!

When he got one look at me he knew,

Milk and Cookies just wouldn’t do!

She was dressed in Red and Purple from her head to her toes

And her dress was all decorated with bling & bows.

A bundle of jewels she had flung around her neck

And she looked like a Queen just opening her pack

or She looked like a Hooker ready to hit the sack!

Her eyes were so glazed, her dimples so merry,

Her cheeks were like roses from all of the Sherry.

Her cute little mouth was drawn up like a bow

And the hair on her head was as white as the snow.

The feather of a boa she held tight in her teeth

And the jewelry encircled her hand like a wreath.

She had a Merle Norman face and a tight little belly

That sure made us think she was a fine little filly!!

She was healthy and fit, a real buff of a grandma

And I giggled when I saw her, in spite of my glaucoma!

A wink of her botox eye and a twist of her ass

Soon gave me to know there was nothing to grasp!

She spoke lots of words before going to work

And straightened her stockings and cursed all the jerks.

And putting a rhinestone in the side of her nose,

And giving a Queenly wave, up the chimney she rose.,

She prissed to her sleigh as the all the men gave a wolf whistle,

But I heard her exclaim ere she flew out of sight